finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
