i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
