whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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