We're facebook friends in real life
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
