But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
