if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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