i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize