Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
