No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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