His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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