The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I intend to get homeless drunk
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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