he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Randomize
