Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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