The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
