she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
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I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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