I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize