Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
PANTIES FOUND
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