So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
