Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
