I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
