I can tuck mytits in my pants
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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