For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize
