And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
