fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize