I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
