Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I just sucked dick on a ferry
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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