she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
When did angry sex become our thing?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
