quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos