Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
