You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Randomize
