think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
