Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
