Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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