bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
