she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
