Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize