Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I think i got beer on your cat.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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