so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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