It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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