The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
