I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
