Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Small penises have feelings too.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
