there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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