i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
