She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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