Nicole vs. Life
barbara walters just said penis...
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
