she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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