Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize