They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
