Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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