Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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